well, beati paoli is on tour…aka everybody i know is out of town…so i am using my abundant free time to watch a documentary on objectum-sexuality.
it’s really interesting to witness the evolution of the “relationships” these women have – not to mention delightfully awkward. also, i was intrigued by a statistic i found after watching the film: at least half of the objectophiles in the world are also afflicted with asperger’s syndrome.
have you heard of Issei Sagawa? he’s the “godfather of cannibals”. if you don’t know him by that title, you might know him as THAT GUY WHO KILLED AND ATE A WOMAN IN FRANCE, ADMITED TO IT, AND NEVER WENT TO JAIL!
in 1981, while attending the sorbonne academy, sagawa killed a fellow college student by inviting her over to his apartment and shooting her in the back of the neck. the obvious next step was to eat her butt.
” Suddenly a lot of sallow fat oozes from the wound. It reminds me of Indian corn. It continues to ooze. It is strange. Finally I find the red meat under the sallow fat. I scoop it out and put it in my mouth. I chew. It has no smell and no taste. It melts in my mouth like a perfect piece of tuna. I look in her eyes and say: ‘You are delicious.’ “
after eating some raw butt, he got out the old electric carving knife and sampled quite a few other parts of her body as well, trying a handful of cooking techniques. now, for most of us, becoming a cannibal would probably be good enough, right? well, not for issei… he decided this night was a good time to also become a necrophile. but don’t worry! issei isn’t just about fucking, mutilating, and eating humans, he also has a sensitive side – when he got tired, he brought the mangled corpse to his bed and lovingly slept along side it.
the next morning, he got up and decided to continue his feast. he would keep removing and preparing parts of her body until the flies buzzing around it became too much for him. when this happened, he began chopping her up into a bunch of little pieces that he would fit into his suitcase. this is the point where you would think the story would start to fall in line with other “chopping people up and putting them in containers” tales, but no, this one is special because most of those other stories don’t include a section where the killer gets aroused by his dismembment and uses a severed hand to masturbate. WOW!!
he fit all of the remains, minus some select pieces that he stored in his fridge, into a suitcase, got in a taxi, and went to a park to dispose of them. when some people saw him having issues with the suitcase, he panicked and ran off. human body parts were seen protruding from the suitcase, and the cops were called. a couple days later, sagawa was arrested and found to be TOO FUCKING CRAZY. he was put in an institution for a couple years, eventually being deported back to japan, where he spent aproximately one and a half more years in an asylum. then he was released. but don’t worry! this isn’t one of those cases where the disgusting murderer ends up living the rest of his days in squalor, shunned by society. no sir! issei is a regular damn celebrity; appearing on tv programs, writing restaurant reviews, and starring in softcore porn. he’s currently living in an apartment in tokyo, but has a passport to germany. THIS IS GOOD!?
the illustrations compiled on the flyer were taken from a spanish horror magazine called “Delirium”, which i can’t find ANY info on, and a painting of st denis, by Leon Bonnat. st denis is a cool character because after he was beheaded at montmartre, he picked up his severed head and walked for TWO MILES, preaching a sermon the whole way. he’s also the patron saint of HEADACHES! no joke.
you can find it on Soft Rock… which is out of print.
Lifter Puller, a.k.a. LFTR PLLR, is one fantastic, defunct band. they existed between 1994 and 2000 in minneapolis, and two of the members are currently in The Hold Steady. Everything about this band is amazing, but one thing i really love is the “lifter puller folklore”. you see, many of the songs have lyrics that contribute to an ongoing story involving a small cast of characters. these pretty much ALWAYS involve heavy drug use, nightclubs, and sex. so… in other words… SOOO GOOD!
check out an archived version of the old lifter puller site right here.
i walked to the video store in good spirits. the night was cool, but not cold, my head and throat weren’t hurting like they had recently been accustomed to, i had eaten pizza for dinner, everything was very pleasant. i walked in to blockbuster, and down the isle, turning at the horror section. as my eyes scanned along the first row of dvds, my spirits suddenly fell. sitting on the shelf, staring mockingly at me, were amityville II: The Possession and amityville 3-D. FUCK!! the two amityville movies i’ve seen are worthless, and i wasn’t ready for what i assumed were two more completely awful wastes of time and money, not only for me, but for the people who made the films. after i had quit hyperventilating, and came back to my senses, i realized that both films had miraculously been rented. i breathed a sigh of relief, wiped the cold sweat off my brow, and said a prayer of thanks to whatever god is watching over me. the next two films on the shelf were films i had actually thought about renting before starting this quest. (quest for what? i’m not sure. maybe i’ll find the answer to that at the end of the journey)
another film that probably shouldn’t be in the horror section. this is more of a mystery film. it’s about this private detective who is hired by some mysterious “religious fanatic” to find a missing person. it stars mickey rourke, robert de niro, and lisa bonet (of cosby show fame). good film, but you figure out the mystery pretty quick. i like the cinematography, the visuals, and the over all feel that the movie has. lisa bonet is naked alot. so if you ever wanted to see Denise Huxtable Kendall in the nude, then you’ll certainly enjoy this film.
i recomend this film to Ryan C. Meier, and anyone else who has an irrational fear of spiders, because they might actually find it scary. i thought this movie was actually done pretty well. it never got TOO rediculous, although it is just like any other ‘new deadly species’ film. some new species is found in south america and accidentally brought back and released unknowingly into civilization. then people start dying, and no one knows why. then someone thinks they know, but no one believes him/her. then they find out he/she’s right and the last half is all action or tension and special effects. john goodman is in it, and his character is cool. and the spiders are done pretty well. they’re even better than the spiders in the beyond!!
i’m still sick, but i haven’t noticed any red splotches yet, so i’m just going to keep assuming it’s just sinuses, and not strep throat. doctors are lame and a waste of my time, i can’t be bothered to go see one unless it’s an emergency.
my favorite part of cnn stories is that they give you the story ‘highlights.’ which are, for this story:
1. Man and woman being caught having sex during morning Mass
2. Italian couple defended their actions claiming they are atheists
3. Bishop of Cesena: Couple’s behavior was blasphemous and offensive
4. Mass to be held to restore the cathedral’s “purity”
i mean, what’s the point of these highlights? especially when the story itself is less than a quarter of a page long? actually, this whole article blows my mind because of its stupidity.
here’s the rest of the story:
(CNN) — A man and a woman have been charged by police in Italy after they were found having sex in a confession box, it was reported Wednesday.
The Italian ANSA news agency said the young man and woman were taken into custody by police in the northern city of Cesena following a telephone complaint from a man attending morning Mass in the city’s cathedral.
Authorities were alerted after a parishoner heard “rustling and groaning” coming from inside the confession box and pulled back the curtains to reveal a goth-rock couple engaged in oral sex, ANSA said.
The agency said the pair — a 31-year-old laborer and a 32-year-old teacher — defended their conduct saying: “We are atheists and for us, having sex in church is like doing it any other place.”
However, Bishop Antonio Lanfranchi of Cesena-Sarsina took said the couple’s behavior was “an outrage of notable proportions which bespeaks unutterable squalor.”
He added that a special ceremony would be held to purify the confession box.
"Being Strangled" b/w "Us Mere Mortals" (02/08/11)
"Billy and the Black Spot Under an Ugly Moon" (01/11/11)
"Radio Prohibidas" b/w "Never Know" (01/11/11)
"Merry Christmas (Don't Forget To Write)" (12/25/10)
"I'll Take The Bullet For You" b/w "Zenith/Nadir" (12/14/10)
"Warholism (Is Polaroiding)" b/w "Among The Saints" (11/09/10)
"Frantic Prayer" b/w "Kicking The Tires" (10/12/10)
"Gravitational Collapse" b/w "Carcinogenic Kiss" (9/14/10)