It’s official: Metroid Other M sucks

Yep. I’ve only played about an hour of the game but that was too much. The character designs are very NOW which is bad for a game that takes place in a futuristic society in some other galaxy. Samus’ character is just as ridiculous as you’ve heard. She seriously acts like a brat and none of her soliloquies make any sense. The gameplay is not very smooth and the switching between 3rd and 1st person is awkward. Metroid Prime Hunters was a bit weak and repetitive but it was way better than this thing. It’s so disappointing that this game was overseen by Yoshio Sakamoto. There are very few long-running game series that are totally free of poor entries but Metroid hung in there through nine entries. That all ended August of 2010.

-Matthew Bert Goode

7 responses to “It’s official: Metroid Other M sucks

  1. Esp. for Ryan:

    She said: I listened to Matt’s eager giddiness for weeks, while he drooled in anticipation of this game’s release date — then, apparently, it was SO awful that he couldn’t even bother playing it in front of me.

    I didn’t watch a second of this one, and it occupied less than 60 minutes of Matt’s life.

  2. P.S. Samus is a pretty cool name.

  3. one time Cecil called her Seamus.

  4. Firstly, I have to admit that I’m a hardcore Metroid fan. I was playing it all back in the, well, olden days and it was hard to stop playing because it brought a new type of reality into your life. Without being too deep or overdramatic about a video game, let’s just say the first version zapped a pretty good amount of my 6 or 7 year-old age.

    Fast-forward to Super Metroid and I swear to God I skipped at least 2 more years of my life–I still don’t know where my teens went. I think they’re hanging out somewhere in Brinstar… Yep, that game (in my uber humbled opinion) will always be the king of the crop. It introduced (for the first time in the Metroid saga) situations and experiences that still have yet to be topped.

    Now what happened between then and now is up for anyone’s guess. I suppose much of it has to do with leaving home for college and getting into some relationship ordeals I would rather avoid discussing, but when everything went 3D, I knew this would be trouble.

    I never messed with the 64 or anything else after the Playstation. I hardly even messed with that because I have just way too much sentimental obsessiveness with the regular Nintendo and Super Nintendo, but from what I understand, I guess the Metroid game for the 64 was supposedly alright. Who knows… I just don’t care.

    But as far as this rendition is concerned for the Wii… Well, this might take a while to explain…

    I’ve been keeping tabs on things through YouTube so far as I’m broke and have about 1.3 cents in the bank due to a car loan and apartment I can’t really afford–hey, cut me some slack; it’s the only place in town without cockroa–uh, never mind…

    So far, the walkthroughs posted by whoever on YouTube seem to show a pretty interesting way of making Samus move on and forward in life. Anyone who knows me will tell you that I hate new things because I’m one of those people who can’t get over stuff. It’s always manifested in my breakups, recess bullies, all the above, but when it came to this newest Metroid, I futilely have to admit that they did an alright job. Oh, but don’t throw your stones and rotten Granny Smiths at me just yet: I do have some sharp sticks to poke at whats-his-face (the designer guy)…

    1.) Everything is Dungeon Siege. Okay, maybe this needs to be elaborated a bit… In that old fantasy game, everything was linear. What I mean by this is that you were free to explore whatever you wanted given it was along the dotted line. Same here. It’s also equivalent to the first Mario Brothers–how much room for creativity did THAT have, right? Well, same here: normally–especially in Super Metroid–you could expect some offshoots of tunnels to morph ball through. In this, however, it seems as if every tiny tunnel has 1 single direction that just so happens to lead you to where your next objective needs to be. The reason this sucks is due to fabrication and synthesized gameplay. You’re forced to do what the designers force you to do… This is not a good thing and reflects a few things:
    A.) Nintendo was under a crunch with their developers and needed to push a product.
    B.) There was poor project management and not enough testing / R&D.
    C.) Nintendo was out for a quick buck and didn’t care about how much detail everything had.

    2.) Okay, I’m just as heterosexual as any other dude, but seriously, when are we going to get over the whole lipstick diva crap? It’s Alicia Silverstone meets Siamese twin tandem of Shaobo Qin, Rambo, and Usain Bolt. I mean, c’mon! And what gives with her push-over attitude!? Give me a break! The woman is obviously going through some form of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder with a mixture of “penis envy” and Dissociative Personality Disorder all in one… Someone call Sigmund… I’m sure they still have him back in one of the cryos… Time for a quick Catharsis session.

    3.) Where’s the Metroid music? Don’t get me wrong, I love the ambiance and I’m okay with the music used so far–again, I’m only on walkthrough number 4 at the moment–but this IS a Metroid game, right? Well, where’s our beloved “Chozo Statue Room” tune? Where’s our other familiar melodies, too? None have thy peeped thus disappointed I am for thine…

    4.) While watching the walkthroughs, I could have swore I was watching “The Days of Our Lives.” Jimanychrismas… This part was too over-the-line for me.

    5.) What’s with the lab geek? “Just the way I like it.”, “Just like that.”, etc. SHUT UP DILL ROD.

    Oh, there’s still more and again, I’m only on number 4 of the walkthroughs…

    6.) There seems to be an inconsistency with the “critters” invading this flashlight stardock they’re on. For example, remember the wrecked ship in Super Metroid? Do you remember those floating creatures that started slowly in pursuit but gradually sped up and chased you? Remember how they could only be killed with a Super Missile? Well, correct me if I’m wrong, but aren’t those aboard this station near the elevator or something? Maybe I need to just go to bed due to insomnia…?

    So whatever. I Googled “Other M Sucks” and stumbled over this website while walking through the deluge of queries and after I read the post, I just couldn’t help myself… Don’t tempt me to come back and post again about my continuing disappointment in today’s failed 2.0 world, ’cause I’ll do it; I ain’t scurred…


  5. Metroid Other m Rules.

    Your all crazy Metroid Other M is a great game, sure its no masterpeace but its still a hell of a lot better then a majority of whats on the wii. the only real thing I have against it is Samus Arans potrail (espically in the scene with Ridley) and needing authorization to use abilitys rather then gain them.

  6. other m back to the roots

    metroid/zero mission, metroid 2, super metroid, other m and fusion are the only metroid games that are worth calling metroid games prime = shit and everything that has to do with prime

    For anyone that says prime is better or that other m sucks
    well then your not a true metroid fan
    and just one of the new wannabe kids that thinks 3d Is cool and dont know shit

  7. Derpy Hooves

    Other M looks awful. There’s nothing wrong with changing something about a successful formula, but they just did everything WRONG.
    Samus is supposed to be some fearless, amazonian space bounty hunter, and what they’ve given us is an anime fapping post for male fans.

    Prime is an example of a successful formula becoming even better. The first Prime game had all the exploration of previous Metroids, awesome remixed tunes from old games, and a few cool new ones, all topped off with a first person perspective that immersed you in the game’s eerie atmosphere.

    Other M lacks several of these features, but my main complaints are the aforementioned sexualizing and degrading of intergalactic bounty hunter Samus Aran, as well as the fact that Other M FUCKING AIMS FOR YOU! Oh and don’t forget, no more collecting items! You can now REGENERATE things by just thinking REALLY hard.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s