Monthly Archives: June 2008

movie challenge 2005: chapter 8

 chapter 1, chapter 2, chapter 3, chapter 4, chapter 5, chapter 6, chapter 7

May 10th, 2005


another micro-budget film. all shot on video. lots of boobs, blood, and bdsm. the thing about this type of movie, is that you seem to grade ’em on a whole different scale. it’s like saying some grade school kid’s art is great. you wouldn’t say it’s great when compared to a professional artist. so when i say this wasn’t BAD, i’m not saying to go watch it. i’m saying that compared to other movies made by amateurs, it’s not one of the worst. it flowed well, some of the scenes were cool, and the story wasn’t awful. the acting was usually very bad, but that’s a given. for not having a budget, it had some really cool monster puppets.

***that man was not in the film

The Bone Snatcher:

set in the south african desert. something is killing people and leaving nothing but bones. and those bones end up disappearing later. a team of a handful of people working at a mine out there end up having to fight it. yeah. it’s your basic x-files plot, minus aliens and government officials. i liked the monster alot. it was gross and not too rediculous. there wasn’t much to the movie, but i think that helped it. if they had tried adding more stuff it coulda ended up going too long and would’ve probably gotten boring. it wasn’t a bad movie, but it wasn’t memorable. just your basic “monster chasing a couple people around in a secluded area” film.



***i can’t tell you how tempted i am to rewrite these things…


I guess I like the new Coldplay? I guess this will make Matt mad? Hehehe :)

Coldplay Viva La Vida

  1. Life in Technicolor: A great, building, first song that does not bore the listener.
  2. Cemeteries of London: An excellent song that sets the more serious tone for the latest Coldplay album. This is not done by the title and lyrics alone, but also by the deeper, darker sound of the music.
  3. Lost: What an interesting switch-up for this determinedly serious, dark album. Still, the underlying organ keeps a gothic feel and somehow works splendidly with the slow claps. Whirling and great, but not my favorite track.
  4. 42: This strikes me as more old school Coldplay than any other title on this album. There is a synth sound that comes in about a third-way in that I have not heard/noticed on the other Coldplay albums I have heard, as I’m sure there are many sounds heard here that weren’t on previous albums.
  5. Lovers In Japan/ Reign Of Love: The first section (Lovers in Japan, I will assume) could be a very polished Envy Corps song, all around. The second part, Reign of Love, makes it a Coldplay song. With any lesser album, I would think that this second part was a trying, experimental effort, but the two-part song works here.
  6. Yes: This song is rounding out the album nicely. It makes sense that it is on same album as Lost. While it fits, it is kind of a weak song and I’ll be surprised if they try to turn this into a single, though, I would be interested to see what a music video of this would look like.
  7. Viva La Vida: Initially, I thought the cello or strings or whatever that is thumping throughout this song was too rich to be a synth, but after Ryan suggesting it could be a synth and trying to listen to it as synth, I can see it. Someone, please confirm if this is a synth! I really like this song, by the way, like really like it.
  8. Violet Hill: How goth of a title.
  9. Strawberry Swing: Not my favorite song on this album.
  10. Death And All His Friends: Who really can call a song this and get away with it, really? The echo-y vocals sound great and work perfectly on the last track of this ghostly album.

I talked to Greg and we agreed that this is one of our favorite albums of 2008. Sometimes I do lose interest and I have my complaints, but there is no doubt in my mind that Viva La Vida is a solid album. B+

movie challenge 2005: chapter 7

chapter 1, chapter 2, chapter 3, chapter 4, chapter 5, chapter 6

May 9th, 2005

The Blair Witch Project:

i really like this movie. the first time i saw it, with lori and jen and morty and chris (and i think others) way back when it was in the theaters, i left unimpressed. but when i re-watched it, i realized how wonderful it is. it leaves practically everything to the imagination. you never actually see any monsters or ghosts or anything, which is great. the acting is very good. and the story is good too. i also like how they went about making it. and i like how they went to all the trouble of making fake documentaries and stuff to help hype the movie. so if you’ve never seen it, i recomend watching it. and if you have seen it, but were unimpressed, i recommend watching it again. preferrably alone and in the dark, with the sound turned up.

The Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2:

what the hell is the book of shadows? after watching the film, i realized i don’t think it was ever even mentioned. the story is pretty interesting. it’s about a group of people who go out to the woods where the tapes from the first movie were found. they set up cameras and sit around drinking and stuff. then they black out, and when they wake up everything is destroyed except the tapes and they don’t remember anything. then they go back to one guy’s house to watch the tapes and more fucked up stuff happens. the acting is shitty at times. parts of it don’t work. but overall, it’s pretty good.


i’ll put it this way… lloyd kaufman plays a tiny roll in it, and that’s the best part. it’s your basic low budget slasher film. lots of boobs, fake looking gore, horrible acting, lame plot, etc. i don’t like slasher films.

Blood Thirst: Legend of the Chupacabra:

this movie was inspiring. if someone can get something this shitty released on dvd, then i KNOW i can make a movie. another low budget independent film. all shot on video with people who obviously aren’t actors. the writing was shit. the pacing was shit. everything was shit. it’s about the chupacabra, and they actually talk about some of the real theories, which is nice, but then they turn the chupacabra into a vampire who is going around killing people. so an old vampire hunter goes after it. then he kills himself to kill the vampire leader, thus ending the terror that all the vampires have caused, and ending the legend of the chupacabra.



movie challenge 2005: chapter 6

chapter 1, chapter 2, chapter 3, chapter 4, chapter 5

May 8th, 2005

1:37 am

Beyond Re-Animator:

awesome gore. it’s one of those ‘horror-comedy’ films like dead alive. this is the third in the ‘re-animator’ series. my blockbuster doesn’t have the first two, so i don’t know how it compares to those. i would like to see the others, because the director claims this one has the least amount of gore. this movie was fun for the most part, but seemed to go on a bit too long, and had a few boring parts. that’s the problem with films made just for gore, they rarely use the gore in such a way to keep your attention the whole time. they usually have a bunch of pointless scenes to add more gore, but it takes away from the flow of the movie. the bonus features had a great techno-pop music video called ‘move your dead bones’. i don’t know who it’s by. maybe it would’ve told me if i could’ve sat through more than 30 seconds of it.

2:47 am

well fuck. i just learned there are FIVE MORE amityville movies!!

Amityville 4: The Evil Escapes
The Amityville Curse
Amityville 1992: It’s About Time
Amityville: A New Generation
Amityville Dollhouse

they are all either made for tv movies, or direct to video. luckily, i’ll probably never see any of these.

***i decided to look for the “move your bones” video on youtube. not only did i find the version from beyond re-animator, but also an awfully good flash video featuring furries.

and here’s the WIKIFUR entry about it


Dear Scott, Mega Man 9 (wtf?)

Last week word was leaked that a Mega Man 9 was forthcoming. “Oh, wow!” people said. The common conclusion was that it would be a high quality, big production to bring Mega Man into the current generation. Sure, Mega Man never went away, but his games of the last 10 years have been primarily spin-offs and have not used the latest technology. Apparently, Mega Man 9 will continue that tradition . . .

Yes, that is a screenshot for the upcoming Mega Man 9. Apparently, it will be a downloadable Wii Ware game that, as you can see, takes great pains to look just like the 6 NES Mega Man games. I could see the appeal of such a game . . . if it weren’t for the fact that there are already 6 NES Mega Man games! And it’s a step back because Mega Man 7 & 8 were released for SNES and PlayStation and have updated graphics. Plus, wasn’t Mega Man & Bass for SNES basically Mega Man 9? Sure, maybe the game will be great but what’s the point, since I and most people haven’t even beaten Mega Man 1-6? I don’t git it.


beati paoli show tonight!!

beati paoli tonight at

the vaudeville mews in Des Moines, IA.



there are two touring bands on this show now, so come support ’em.

Everthus the Deadbeats: way cool people from indianapolis. rockin’ far-out pop music.

Les Deux Magots: dragon babies and blind pigs from st. paul that like to get down.

see ya there!


UAE Likes Their Tall Buildings

So, I came across an article about an 80-story, energy-efficient, rotating skyscraper that is being built in Dubai.

I also remember watching a program on HGTV about world architecture and Dubai is home to the world’s tallest building, the world’s tallest hotel and, soon enough, the world’s tallest structure.  It seems like a lot of buildings in Dubai are still being competed and they are all claiming that they will be/are the world’s tallest.  To keep it simple, I included the winner’s on HGTV.  Also, Iowa is home to the 10th largest structure in the world, the WOI-Tower, which is in Alleman.

Tallest Hotel: Burj Al Arab

World’s Tallest Building: Burj Dubai

Gainesville music – LOLOLOL

Check out this hilarious article:

Hee hee hee hee! If you don’t want to read it, it’s all about how irrelevant (and bad) ska band Less Than Jake are releasing an album that’s all about Gainesville, their hometown. Tee hee! The article is full of public officials expressing their glee and sharing their uninformed opinion that a “big spotlight” will be on Gainesville the next few weeks. LOLOLOL A big spotlight courtesy of Less Than Jake?! Guffaw!

Yes, Less Than Jake are from Gainesville and people around here act like they’re hot shit, for some reason. When they occasionally play in town, assholes are like, “Oh, I’m going to the Less Than Jake show!” Remember shitty rock group Sister Hazel? I do, unfortunately. Same deal. From Gainesville, people here still like them.

Also, that piece of shit Tom Petty is from here. Unfortunately, he is genuinely famous but he’s probably even worse than the aforementioned bands. The moral of the story is: there are shitty bands in Gainesville and they get signed.



Today, Tony and I concluded our Orlando adventures with a visit to Epcot. I was just there 2 years ago with Patricia so there wasn’t much that was new or fresh for me but there were some changes. Here are the rides we braved . . .

Test Track: Meant to simulate riding a car in a General Motors test track. There are some lame moments and some fairly exciting moments. Recommended overall. B

Mission SPace: A shortish, decent space simulator. Nothing very engaging. I liked it a lot more 2 years ago. B-

Ellen’s Universe of Energy: Oh, fuck, it stars Ellen Degeneres and she’s as awful as ever. This one is newwwwwwww but awful. Also stars Bill Nye the Science Guy, Jamie Lee Curtis, and Alex Trebeq. It’s mostly a movie but partially a ride. Most of the ride section is recycled from the old Exxon dinosaur ride that used to inhabit the same part of the building. Some very patronizing, simplified, and inaccurate scientific information. Also pandering to creationists by referring to Big Bang as something that “many scientists believe”. Oh, really? Many? Not almost all? F

Spaceship Earth: A slow, relaxing ride featuring the history of mankind, basically. The scenes are elaborate and the animatronics decent. It could have received a very high score but there’s a very clear Euro/Mediterranean bias, attributing the invention of paper to Egypt (China had it first). It also attributes the creation of complicated highway systems to Rome, even though Persia beat them to it by 200 years. In fact, the only “achievement” attributed to someone other than Europe/Egypt is the Middle East, but only for possessing copies of the books lost in the fire at Alexandria! C+ (could have been an A-!)

The Seas With Nemo and Friends: A new ride. Sort of the evolution of the boring Winnie the Pooh type rides. You travel through real, physical environments but the actions of the Nemo characters are projected on various screens. Just okay. C+

Living With the Land: A boat tour thing. Initially, it travels through scenes of farms and various ecosystems. Pretty nice designs. Then it travels through a facility where various plans are grown in experimental manners. Pretty cool. B+

Journey Into Imagination with Figment: Slow, aimless, bad animatronics. D

River of Time: Stars Three Caballeros. Nice Mexican scenes but boring. C

The Maelstrom: A baffling ride. A mostly slow and boring boat ride through Norwegian scenes but with a couple of lame drops. Is it supposed to be a thrill ride?! C-

Shows . . .

Honey I Shrunk the Audience: Stupid. Unfunny. D-

China something or other: Awesome video in “circle vision” (360 degree view with screens surrounding the room). Made me want to move to China. That’s pretty good, right? Avoided any and all controversial CHina topics. B

Turtle Talk: Impressive. A Pixar-animated turtle somehow communicates in real time with audience members. I still don’t really get how they did it. The characters were cheesy but these parks are supposed to have things that make you say “wow” and there should be more stuff like this. B+

American Adventure: Not as cheesy or dishonest as the Hall of Presidents show. Good animatronics. Got hokey towards the end but featured Mark Twain and quoted John Steinbeck twice so gets a . . . B-.

Circle of Life: Unfortunately hilarious movie where Disney lectures the audience about “respecting every living creature” (there’s a restaurant serving chickens by the ton in the same building) and being responsible regarding the environment. Really? Disney World itself destroyed several marshland ecosystems when it was built and is still criticized for poor environmental practices and they’re going to lecture me?!

General gripes . . .
The whole park is a preachy environmental thing that fails to actually dig deeply into any issues. Most of the areas have a fucking sponsor. While waiting for the Honey I Shrunk the Audience show you watch Kodak commercials! No! I paid a million dollars to get in here, don’t try to sell me shit, unless it’s from a gift shop (which I can easily avoid).


World War III

If you don’t want to read the whole article, it’s conservative wacko predicting that Israel will attack Iran between our autumn elections and the inauguration. This is all based on recent developments that indeed do seem to suggest something might go down soon (Israeli long-range test runs and recent comments by leaders). I have to admit, there is a strange part of me that is separated from it all that finds the whole thing exciting. A real, goshdarned war between 2 modern militaries! This sort of thing is very rare post-World War II. Most wars of the last 50 years have been waged by a modern military on one side and a very clever, determined but but less powerful (on paper) enemy on the other side. Examples are the current Iraq war, Vietnam War, Soviet/Afghani war.

Anyway, back when the 9/11 attacks occurred I wrote in a journal or something about how it could turn into World War III. Not that it will but just how it could happen. Well, I think it could possibly happen if Israel attacks Iran. It could EASILY happen if Iran were to attack Israel. Anyway, here’s a potential scenario.

Israel attacks Iran in a preemptively defensive act of aggression. Iran would definitely not stand for it and a war would commence. We would certainly enter to defend Israel and Britain would likely do so as well. It could stop there (and perhaps probably would). Contrary to public opinion, Iran is NOT an Arab nation (it’s Persian). It has a majority Shiite population and it’s decisions are unpopular. As a result, the Arab nations wouldn’t go nuts to help out but Syria probably would. So it’s Israel, US, UK vs Iran, Syria. If Iran could somehow turn the whole thing into a Muslim rallying point all hell could break loose. Even if the other Muslim nations don’t join in, rioting and civil strife could easily be instigated in most of these countries.

Basically, all that’s required is for Pakistan to get involved. If they could somehow be persuaded to act or join Iran, in spite of the fact that Pakistan is now our “friend”, a real can of worms is opened. Pakistan’s mortal enemy, India, would likely join on our side. Now neighboring Muslim countries like Bangladesh and Indonesia could answer the cry. Is Australia, part-time enemies of Indonesia, then induced to join our side?

China has been a long-time enemy of India’s engaging them in several border battles. Naturally, the Chinese also hate us. Do they sieze the opportunity to take the land that they believe is theirs? Are we then compelled to aid India? And does China take advantage of the chaos to invade Taiwan? Or finally pay back Japan for WWII?

And what does Russia do?! They act like they’re pals with China now but they’re traditionally enemies (even in the communist days). But they hate us much more.

Probably won’t happen.